Saturday, October 23, 2010

The Punished Man, by Frank.

Once there was a tribe called the Moe. Everyone was peaceful but one man, a very big man. He was greedy and liked to take heaps of food, water and other things. 
One day the tribe was short on food and water so people became greedy. The big man hatched a plan to steal all the remaining resources. At night when everyone was asleep, he made a big bag and sachet to hold the resources in. But, he didn't know that a kid was still awake, and saw what he was doing. The man ran away happily. 
The kid told the tribesmen what he saw and they decided to hunt him He was walking gracefully until he heard noises and then ran. He tripped up and was caught by the tribesmen. Then came a lion who saw the captured man. The tribesman decided to leave him there fir his punishment, and hoped that by sacrificing him they would be rewarded with food.
One day later, food and water appeared at the site where the man was sacrificed. The man's spirit remains there and the story is told to young children to remind them to never steal because you always get caught.
You can run but you can't hide.


  1. HI Frank,
    This is a great story, and you have followed the way the Aboriginals wrote these tales well. I think your descriptions are interesting and informative.
    Next time you could work on the length of your writing, to make it longer.
    Nice Job!

  2. Dear Frank,
    Your story was interesting to read. It would be scary to be the kid who saw the man stealing and wondering if he was going to see you. I like how your story had a moral and said that stealing was bad.
    From Nina at GLS.

  3. hey,
    That was pretty good but you made it scary and sad that was something different..
    Good =)

  4. heey frank
    this story was cool and scary .
    keep it up .
    by jenevieve